Grace Mitchell
Grace is a musician and mother of new earthling Evie.
We met in the special care unit of the hospital our children were born in. An eerie place to meet a new friend, but one that led to the quick shared intimacy of discussing the haziness of new motherhood.
Our interaction stirred reflections of the role of clothes, surpassing how we look, moreover, how we feel and how we orient the changing self.
More on these reflections and my interview with Grace below.
I've been thinking a lot about the women who have come into my store after having a baby, to navigate dressing their changed bodies.
Motherhood overhauls both body and mind. Inner and outer architecture undergo rapid hormonal changes and a shift of priorities. Naturally, there’s a longing to return to the self that was, in part through reaching for the clothes we used to wear.
Jeans almost always come up, representative of a certain shape they used to be. While sometimes we’ve found new jeans that work, we’ve uncovered the vulnerability that comes with accepting a new iteration of self and her new contours.
Maybe the same cut of jeans no longer work, and in the grand scheme of things, that’s ok. Re-orienting one’s identity after giving life is an ongoing, humbling act and dressing is just one part of the equation, but it’s a potent one.
There's a beautiful moment in these images where Grace is searching for a certain pair of red leather pants, wondering if they'll still fit. To her surprise, they do, a small joy and reclamation of a prior self.
PHOTOGRAPHY: MADELINE DENEYS
DIRECTION & STYLING: SUSANNA LO
WORDS: MELISSA MIKLETIC
Melissa: We are both new mothers. I vastly underestimated how all consuming the role is. It narrows your bandwidth and requires you to severely edit what you want and can do outside of raising a little soul. The matriarchal archetype is one of self sacrifice. Within (but not exclusive to) this context, I feel like the importance of dressing can be undermined as something tethered to vanity, when in fact, I find it so tethered to self-esteem. This in mind, getting dressed has always been important for my mental state, even if I’m destined for a day at home. I’d love to know…
What kinds of garments have softened you into motherhood and been mainstays in your new life landscape?
Grace: Being able to put jeans back on was important for me. Granted, I’m not the same shape and size as I was pre-baby. Jeans have always made me feel myself, particularly Levi’s, so not being able to button up my 501’s was something that added to the pile of feeling not like myself throughout pregnancy. Denim jeans are identity affirming for me.
M: What is your relationship toward dressing yourself and what do you prioritise if it needs to be done more hurriedly?
G: I love to play around with outfits and I’d gladly spend many hours picking out looks, but these days the priority is looking as French as I can as quick as I can. Blouse, jeans, ballet flats, are my go to.
M: Have you found your style has changed since becoming a mother?
G: When I was pregnant I had no idea what to wear and I refused to purchase maternity clothing on a personal and ethical level. I ended up wearing a lot of stretchy things of course, but I also went pretty trad-wifey, which I cringe at now. Post-pregnancy, I just try to keep it simple and timeless like I mentioned before. I leave the elaborate costumes and outfits for shows, and going out with the girls.
M: You mostly buy from op shops, so if you’re investing in new, considered items, what kinds of pieces justify that investment?
G: Something very expensive that I’ll wear a lot has to be very well-made, quality, natural materials. Something leather, wool, or cashmere. Perhaps shoes, bag, coat, sweater, or wallet.
M: As a musician, how has your creativity been impacted, perhaps even expanded by this new chapter in your life?
G: Truthfully, I’m just focused on Evie at the moment. I’ll eventually write an album about her and my experience of motherhood, but right now I’m just consumed by the early days, because I know they go fast.
M: Do you have any formative memories of your mother’s wardrobe or those first memorable items of clothing you wore as a young girl? Perhaps even items you’ve inherited?
G: My mom had a lot of clothes always. I inherited that quality from her. She didn’t love when I’d play around in her closet but I loved being in there looking at all the cool stuff she had. What she wanted me to wear and what I wanted to wear was super different. She’d often tease me about how I’d dress myself which really messed with my outward expression.
(Grace is photographed below with her mother in law, Rose, because it takes a village)
M: You and Alex take such joy in dressing Evie. I took a leaf out of your book and bought Emile some second hand Doc Martens, they’re entirely unnecessary, he can’t walk. But, there’s something to the act of dressing a baby. Paint me a verbal image of a morning dressing Evie, you’ve alluded that (your partner) Alex is quite methodical about it.
G: I have a funny thing about Evie being in Jammie’s in the daytime. I don’t know why but it makes me feel like a negligent mom. Like, if I’m not in PJ’s then she shouldn’t be in PJ’s… so Alex and I dress Evie everyday in outfits. It’s our favorite thing about taking care of Evie and it’s a whole fun theater. She really loves it, especially when Alex is dressing her she’s laughing and shrieking with joy. It’s hilarious. Alex is actually better at dressing her than I am because he makes her look like a little person. I tend to turn her into a little dolly or cherub. I’ll put something super girly and frilly on her. Maybe I also picked that up from my mom.
M: You’re nearing returning to work, what kinds of reflections are stirring on your time of maternity leave? Have you enjoyed the enforced slower pace?
G: I wish I had a year with Evie, or several before going back to work. I’ve really enjoyed it, and even though this phrase is overused, it really is a full time job. It takes the same amount of focus as a full-time job and then some because it never stops. However, now, I always tell my friends to have kids because if you’re not afraid of responsibility and commitment, it’s easy. The responsibility is the hardest part, but it’s easy if you’re responsible already. I don’t mean responsible in a stiff or limited way, rather, in the way where if you have a pet animal, you have to take care of it really well. That kind of responsibility.
M: Any other sentiments you’d like to share?
G: Women are stronger than men in every capacity, even physically. Parenthood is great. I love my daughter and Alex. Thank you for this interview!
